Lust
by Sincerely-Vixen
Summary: Kagome Higurashi wanted love, but all InuYasha Takahashi could give her was Lust. InuXKag


Lust

One-Shot

Vixen-Virus

Rating: M – Mature situations.

Genre: Romance/Tragedy.

Summary: Kagome Higurashi wanted love, but all InuYasha Takahashi could give her was Lust. InuXKag.

Last Edit: December 29, 2009.

* * *

_Lust_

**I** walked down the street, my hands in my pockets close to my sides as I did. I looked around in the dark of the night; my eyes adjusting to the blindness. I walked by the bus stop, right under the glare of the soft glowing city lamp light. I shifted my black leather jacket wrapping it tighter around me as the chill of the night air surrounded and consumed me.

Walking down the isolated street I saw the darkened alley ways, filled with the drug addicted and the homeless. I narrowed my eyes seeing an old, tired looking man reaching out his arm. He was wrapped in a ragged blue blanket, leaning on a green dumpster, his arm, the one reaching out to me, the forearm was slapped with bandages, and I could tell, he was a drug abuser. I walked on.

I ignored his cough. He strangled out a painful grumble but I turned away. I knew that may sound harsh, but he was the one who chose drugs, I wasn't about to give pity to someone who didn't need it in the first place.

I walked down the littered streets of Tokyo, finally coming in toward downtown; I saw the blaring lights of the neon signs flashing left and right, cars zooming by and groups of teens laughing loudly. I narrowed my eyes, not use to the sudden intrusion of lights.

Walking still I was shoved through crowds of people, some teens laughing and stumbling along the sidewalk. I wrapped my jacket around me tighter as I turned one last time. There, right in front of me laid a pink neon sign spelling the words _Club Shikon._ I smirked and ran a hand through my long silver hair. I walked to the front, the huge line behind me glaring and grumbling, seeing the same girl as before.

She had short, black hair and intriguing violet eyes. She had on red lipstick and light blue eye shadow; she was wearing a very low cut black top and a short black skirt. She smiled and winked my way.

"Hey there, Takahashi." She said in a low, husky voice, always using my last name instead of my first. I smirked and nodded my head.

"Hey, Yura, is Kagome here?" Yura pouted and rolled her eyes, straightening up and hooking her finger, directing me to follow her, putting another girl in front. I followed her silently into the club. There were red and blue flashing lights everywhere, dancers on the stage by a live band, swaying their hips and flipping the head around. The club was packed tonight. There were bodies grinding all around me, the lights making it hard to make out who was who. The smell of smoke and alcohol entering my senses. I tried to follow Yura as best as I could but lost her close to the door by the stage. I looked around and growled. She always did that.

"Hey Yasha." I heard an all too familiar voice. I felt small arms wrap around my body and smirked. I turned around and came face to face with the most beautiful girl I had ever known.

"Hey Kagome." I answered back, leaning down and kissing her lips gently. Kagome Higurashi, the brightest star in the night sky. I had known her since the first year of High school, she was my best friend. She was popular, head of the cheerleaders and the smartest girl I had ever known. She smiled at me, her black hair swaying wildly around her, her bright brown eyes lighting up, her tanned skin being hidden by the flashing red and blue lights. She smiled brightly and kissed me back, closing her eyes as she held me close.

I smirked against her lips and wrapped my arms around her waist, my lips hungrily pulling at hers. She pulled back and kissed my cheek.

"So, how are you stranger?" She asked, winking. I chuckled and shouted over the music.

"I'm good, how about you?" I asked, she smiled and said the same, I leaned down and whispering into her ear.

"I missed you." I felt her shiver in my arms. I smirked and pulled back as she blushed.

Kagome was a dancer, on her free time, just a dancer. Not one of _those_ dancers. She was also a nurse though too. She had a good life; she had a family that loved her, the greatest best friend named Sango Yomoto, and a good career. The one thing she didn't have, though, was the one thing she wanted most.

"I missed you too InuYasha, do you want to go in the back?" She asked blushing again. She always blushed, she was a shy girl but she was confident in herself as well. I smirked and nodded my head. She held my large rough hand in her soft small one, tugging at me to follow her up some stairs. She led me down a dark hallway and into a large red room, the music no more then a low murmur.

"Been a while since we used the VIP room, you usually sneak me back to your house." Her soft angelic voice rang. I chuckled and pulled her into my arms, kissing her neck.

"My room's more comfortable…" I whispered in her neck. She giggled and tilted her head to the side, holding the back of my head, pressing me forward. I walked her backwards to the bed, pushing her down gently. She smiled up at me gently, crawling back, laying her head on the pillow she pulled me to her.

I smirked and crawled over top of her, leaning back down and kissing her neck once again. She giggled and moved her head to the side, fisting my hair in her hands. She moaned gently, wrapping her right leg around my waist as I moved my lips against the crook of her neck. She arched her body gently into me and moaned out my name.

I kissed up her neck to her ear licking it gently. She shivered gently and whispered against my ear, just as she always did,

"Say it…please…" I closed my eyes, breathing in her scent and pulling back. Looking into her deep brown eyes, smiling and whispering,

"I love you."

That's what she wanted most. She wanted love. I couldn't give that to her though. Sure, Kagome was probably the perfect girl, she could make any guy proud…but I couldn't love her. I did once, I truly did. It was back in the first year of high school, she was dating Koga Ookami. I hated it. I was jealous of that stupid jackass. I knew then that I was in love with Kagome…

She dated Koga for a few months and then they split. We never really got together, and after that, my feelings for her just….faded. She was still my best friend, and I did love her….just not the way she wanted. She confessed to me, a year after that she loved me, I was so surprised but my feelings were long gone by then. I told her the truth that I didn't love her that I _couldn't_; she had just smiled and kissed me. Saying,

"_Just tell me you do, you don't have to mean it…just say it."_ I just nodded my head, and said it. That was the first time we had sex. We got together a lot after that day. She always though, always asked me to say those words before we got anywhere. I always told myself, after, I'd stop soon…but Kagome tugged at my heart like no other.

All she'd have to say was 'do it' and I would. I'd do anything she asked, because I think, in a way, I still loved her…but not that way, and not that strongly. I cared about her, and I wanted to make her happy, but I could never mean it when I said those words. Kagome had a special place in my heart, and even though I didn't feel that way, I'd always keep her in my heart.

"I love you too, InuYasha…" She whispered and kissed me more furiously then she ever had. I was taken back, but soon falling into the sweet abyss that was Kagome.

* * *

I lay there, holding Kagome next to my side; she was sleeping, her arms around my waist, her head on my shoulder, her breathing even. I smiled and looked ahead at the empty wall, just to the right was a big mirror, I looked at our reflections.

Kagome's black hair was a tousled mess around her, her mouth was closed in a firm line, her eyes closed as she slept and I smiled. She was beautiful. She had fallen to earth, gracing us with her presence. She was the princess in the books we read, the heroine in the movies we watched and the angel in the prayers we whispered. She was so much.

I knew then. I knew at that moment. I had to leave. I looked down at her and kissed her forehead and then her lips softly before slipping out of her grip. She frowned slightly and shifted, but still slept. I grabbed my clothes throwing them on as I looked for a piece of paper and pen; I scribbled some words down and grabbed my black jacket rushing out of the room. I shrugged on my jacket and walked down the stairs, into the club that was still blaring its music and flashing its lights. I saw Yura talking to a few guys and shook my head as I darted out of the club.

I placed my hands back into my pocket and walked down the silent streets. Walking down different isolated roads, the only light was the moon and stars. I looked up and smiled a bit.

I knew this was good. I had to leave, Kagome could never move on if she held on to me. I had to leave her, with nothing but words and a kiss; I had to walk out of her life. I know, it sounded stupid. But it was right. I had to get out of her life so she could move on, I couldn't love her. I could only lust after her and Kagome didn't need that. I smiled and looked back ahead, walking down the empty darkness.

* * *

Kagome woke up and reached over feeling nothing. She darted up and saw that InuYasha wasn't there. Confused she looked around and saw a small note on the pillow. She looked at it in slight fear, knowing what its contents were. She picked it up, opening it she read InuYasha's sketchy writing,

_'Kagome,_

_Hey Kag, I know you're probably really mad right now, since I left you this note instead of saying this in person, but Kagome, I couldn't say it to you in person. You know that whenever you ask me something, I'll do it. I couldn't do this though. You are an incredible girl, and you need love, not lust, I can't give you that…I'm sorry Kagome._

_And I do love you._

_Your's truly,_

_InuYasha.'_

Kagome held the note, her eyes watering as her bottom lip trembled. She closed her eyes and whispered,

"I wish you had stayed…I love you, InuYasha…so much." She held the note and herself as she felt her tears making their way down her face.

* * *

Four years later and I walked down the old streets. My memory starting to clear as I re-walked the path I had walked those many years ago. I turned again and saw the neon lights spelling out _Club Shikon_ just like the old days; only the _H_ was burnt out so it spelt _Club Sikon_. I chuckled as I walked in; Yura was there still, greeting some guy. Her hair was longer now, her eyes slightly duller and her appearance a bit more mature. I managed to sneak by her without her noticing.

I went into the club and mused. The club was still the same, the same red and blue flashing lights surrounding the club, bodies grinding into each other, the smell of alcohol still floating around. I chuckled and walked near the stage, keeping my jacket around me and looking at the band. I watched as the singer thrashed his head, singing lyrics as the dancers danced in the background. I watched each dancer, looking to see a familiar face when I saw her…

Kagome Higurashi…still as beautiful as ever. She was dancing in tune with the others, smiling and looking into the crowd. I watched as she swayed her hips, dancing, stepping around the band.

Her smile…it was the same, her eyes just as bright as before. Her black hair a bit shorter as she bobbed her head to the music. The crowd was cheering on the band as the song ended. I smiled. Kagome was happy, she was happy. That's all I had ever wanted. I wanted Kagome to smile and have her eyes light up every day. I wanted her to be happy.

I smiled to myself and walked through the bodies of teens, making my way out of the club, I looked back once more to see Kagome getting off the stage, and I smiled.

In a way, I think I did love Kagome, but I wasn't enough for her, and I knew that. As much as I loved Kagome, I knew she deserved better, so I made myself believe I didn't love her that way. It was hard, staying away for four years, but I knew, Kagome was happy, and now I could walk away forever, not looking back because I didn't have to. Kagome's smiling face would always be in my mind.

* * *

InuYasha looked at the club one last time before turning, his hands in his pockets, and walking down the old empty street, the lamp lights glowing a faint hue of light down on him, casting his long shadow as he walked further away from _Club Shikon_, from his love and from his lust.

* * *

Kagome wiped the sweat from her forehead, saying bye to all the other back up dancers she made her way into her room. Opening the door to be invited into a red room, she walked to the bed and flopped down.

"Ow…sore…" She mumbled before she got up and walked to her vanity, sitting down at the chair she looked at herself in the mirror. Smiling she brushed back her hair, tying it into a high messy pony tail.

"Kagome! Get your butt down here! We have to get on stage!" Kagome rolled her eyes and laughed.

"I will Sango, hang on a second." She shouted back before looking back at the mirror. Smiling at her reflection she looked up to the right corner, there sticking out was a yellowing piece of paper, slightly bent and ripped, the words InuYasha had written so long ago. She kissed her fingers and pressed it to the note, smiling before whispering as always,

"Thanks InuYasha…for letting me go, I love you." She smiled and stood up, walking out the door.

InuYasha never came back to _Club Shikon_, and he never saw Kagome again. He knew though, that she was happy and that's all he ever wanted. Kagome never saw InuYasha, but she always kept that small note he wrote, it reminded her of her love. She never did move on, but she became a great nurse and a great dancer, she had a good life and she believed it was to InuYasha that she owed her happiness to. She started with love and went to lust but in the end, she still had the same love for him, and always would.

For them, it was never just lust…it was always love.

-

--

---

--

-

A/N: Awe, that was so bittersweet. Hope you enjoyed,

Take care,

Vixen


End file.
